Tuesday, February 19, 2008


I hate emptying the dishwasher.  In fact, I think I would rather poke an angry badger with a spoon than empty the dishwasher one more time...

I know I'm showing the ultimate of laziness here, but really I just can't take it anymore.  My husband thinks I'm nuts.  "How hard is it to put the dishes away" he says "at least you don't have to do them by hand."  
That's true.  This is a step up.  In our first married apartment together I did dishes in a sink about 4 inches deep with water that came out of separate hot and cold faucets.  Humble abode number two had a very bi-polar dishwasher and we weren't quite sure if we were on her good side or not, so until we retired her, most of the dishes were washed by hand.  However, in both of these instances, we were young and reckless--and ate alot of take out.  Not so anymore.  Now I run that machine everynight and by the next night I still have a sink full of dishes that need to be cleaned.  No matter how many times I empty the darn thing, it needs to be emptied again and again--it's MADDENING!
I guess it's not so much about the actual dishwasher but more of what that dishwasher represents.  Never ending housework.  Wouldn't it be nice if just once in a while all the housework got done at one time so for one brief infanitesimal moment you could have a perfectly clean house.  I know its never going to happen, but a girl can dream, right?  

Still, I feel alot of pressure to live up the the TV commercial expectation.  You know the one, where some lady walks into her kitchen with mound of dishes on the counter and she just winks and fills the sink with bubbles and POOF the dishes are miraculously finished in record time and she leaves the kitchen with an actual smile on her face.   I hate that lady and her superhuman cleaning and dishwashing abilities....

Let me show you what dish time at my house looks like.

Now, does that look very conducive to stress free dishwaher emptying?  I THINK NOT!!  

Of course I know the freakishly clean commerical lady is not really real, but I often wonder if there are people (even people I know) that are that clean.  Do they come to my house and cringe at my sticky floor and dirty dishes.  Do they go home and relive the ghastly experience of going to Vanessa's house?  Gosh, I hope not.  I'd better go clean something... Let's start with the dishes.